Letra de Paul Bunyan vs Johnny Appleseed - Epic rap battle parodies

(Feat. WoodenHornets, Froggy)

EPIC RAP BATTLE PARODIES

PAUL BUNYAN

VS

JOHNNY APPLESEED

BEGIN

Ey, chapman, you won't survive this pain that I'm bringing

How can you win? I cut Appletree's for a living

Stop lumberjacking off and focus, I'm manly as hell

You're a nurse, maggot! Do you fondle with your apples as well?

On my way to victory, and this fool is on my route

Punching his face so many times it'll be as red as his fruit

I'm a giant don't you see! Your love for apples is just weird!

This ass-whooping will be almost greater than my majestic beard!

You discovered apple trees, just go to the store

Beef with a lumberjack and get scattered on the floor

I'm like an onion, bringing tears out this brittle funyun

Shoving my ax up your ass, my name is Paul Bunyan

Oh, the Lord's been good to me

Just sitting here plucking from my apple tree

Then this fat son of a bitch tried to step to me

Now he'll learn not to mess with Johnny Appleseed

Forget the lumber camps, you're just a lumber tramp

This tourist attracting scamp's about to get a revamp

I'm on fire, like the kerosine you enjoy drinking

You're just a big oaf, who makes choices without thinking

You little myth bitch, you ain't puttin up no fight

Why're you pissed? Are those jeans pulled up too tight?

This world would be hungry without my discoveries

I'm the reason Newton found the Laws of Gravity, buddy

You're just a pioneer queer, who I'll slice into bits

I'll take that pan off your head and smash your face with it!

You chose not to marry, because you'd take spirits as your wives?

Good luck, chump! You pretty much wasted your whole life

You better pray that you win, and run back to your New Church

I'll drop apple bombs 'til you turn into the nothing that you're worth

By the time i'm done with you, you'll just be Johnny Applejuice

You're a true fruit, bitch, I'll be sure to leave you the bruise

Calm down there partner, you're gettin angrier than you need to be

I'm spitting out these disses like I'm spitting out appleseeds

While I'm chompin' on my sweets, making history, man

You're stompin' on your feet, chasing people off your land

You're just a lonely lumberjack who's in for a shock

The only babe you get in bed, is Babe the Blue Ox

You've been destroyed by Johnny, I'm leaving strong and proud

An apple a day keeps the doctor away, nobody to save you now

WHO WON?

WHOS NEXT?

YOU DECIDE!

EPIC RAP BATTLE PARODIES

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